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Sunday, March 28, 2010

i have not felt so guilty, so upset for SO LONG!
what is this man.
where is the joy!?

what you guys said seriously made me pondering again.
i am mean
i am stubborn
i know what to do, but i am just not willing to do it.

"mean", "duty"
argh those words that pierce hard right into my chest.
i cant help it, i know i am wrong somewhere in the line
i know i am partially at fault but
I AM NOT WILLING TO SPEAK YET!

am i really committing such a sinful crime?
you guys tell me what to do,
and i do know what to do,
just not willing...is that too BAD?!

argh,
i am the bad person to many for this right
i am the foolish person
i am the unforgiving person.
i am seriously a _____ person.
(i get it)

i just wanna fly off this world now.
why is all these unnecessary problems coming?!

GOD PLEASE ANSWER!
i need to know,
i need strength
why do you seem so far away.
(i know you are near, but so close yet so far)
and i can give a reason for that: cause i am unwilling

IT IS ALL BECAUSE I AM UNWILLING!